September 24, 2007

Lemon Water

Let me tell you something that drives me nuts (for, what good are blogs if not as an outlet for childish complaining). I can't stand it when I go to a restaurant and ask for water but instead am brought back supremely watered down lemonade. Now, I know there are those of you who enjoy a slice of lemon on their water glass - and that's fine. But when I ask for a water, I expect to receive only water. If I wanted lemonade, I would order it. And if a lemonade was delivered to me that tasted as watered down as the lemon-water which is so often served in place of water, I would send it back.

Now, this is something I've loathed for some time. But what prompted the blog was this weekend's meals with TinRoof's grandmother, Gan. At each restaurant, Gan would ask the waiter for "water with lemon" and I would ask for "water". And each time, we were both brought the same thing: lemon-polluted-water. I briefly thought, perhaps when I order my drink, I should clarify - "water without lemon". But then I thought, screw that! Why should I be the one who has to clarify? I think Gan had it right when she ordered - she specified exactly what she wanted - just as I did. But only one of us was listened to.

If only I were able to be a jerk in real life (not just on my blog), maybe I would send back my "water" and ask for a water.

September 12, 2007

Dr. Church's Bewitched Ale

The long awaited picture of my home made beer.


September 07, 2007

Pi-th Visit

The Musings have received their Pi-th visitor! (The 3,141-th visitor, that is.) The lucky winner of this shout out is a Verizon Internet Services customer and has an IP address which traces to King of Prussia, Pennsylvania. I didn't even know that was a real town! But it has been google-confirmed and is near Philly which leads me to believe the mystery visitor was my former office mate, the Italian Stallion of Combustion. His visit included 2 page views and a length of 1 minute and 40 seconds - just enough time for a healthy dose prescribed by Dr. Church.

In other visitation news. Someone recently arrived at my site via a Google search for "high altitude flatulence emissions". I've never been more proud than this moment.

September 06, 2007

One time, OK, see, one time (part 7)

OK, so, see, one time Randy Beaman's mom's best friend, whose name is Linda, wanted to get a tan more than anything, so she went to a tanning salon and she stayed in too long and she boiled her guts.

'K, bye.

September 05, 2007

Church's Commercial Challenge

Last month, I supplied you all with a challenge. I was hoping one of you might track down - or at least remember - the "No mommy! That's my food!" commercial. I even offered to grant one wish to the winner of this challenge and sing his praises on my Musings. None of you bit. Fine then. Be that way. However, I have come up with a second challenge. This one is just for fun though - no wishes will be granted.

I've been thinking lately about the long term impact of advertising. There's so much crap on the tube these days. I wonder what will have staying power. Will kids 15 years from now remember the Gecko or the Cavemen? Will they be able to sing the McDonald's jingle? Am I the only one who has a ridiculous memory of this useless crap? I can think back on my childhood and certain commercials or jingles stick out vividly even after all these years. The other day, I couldn't get the old Big Red jingle out of my head and I wondered - am I the only one?

So the challenge is this: Without the aid of YouTube or any other internet cheating device, can any of you remember the lyrics to the old school Big Red jingle?

Give up? You can hear it here. I'd also be curious to hear your nominations for the commercial and/or jingle from your childhood which is most memorable.

September 03, 2007

On the Being of a Grad Student (Part 2)

A moment in the life and times of a graduate student:

It's the week before Labor Day weekend. You have an abstract submission for a conference due on Friday evening. On your own, you might never submit to this conference, or care to attend it; however your advisor is determined to keep up his appearance in the academic community and thus must show you off. You oblige and finish the abstract by Thursday at mid day - sending it to your advisor for one last (well... first) perusal and approval. And while you know the submission deadline will be extended (they always are), your girlfriend will be in town this weekend and you hope to get the abstract out of the way before she arrives. What's more, she has a real job and thus has Monday off from work (legitimately) and you wish to spend time with her. Grad students don't ever really get days off. Even on holidays or approved vacation days your advisor has somehow managed to instill in you a moderate amount of guilt. What kind of slacker grad student takes off for a minor holiday such as Thanksgiving!? So you make plans with your girlfriend to do something fun - perhaps a picnic and then an afternoon matinée. But he knows. Somehow your advisor has caught wind of the fact that you intend to stray from his bidding. So he plots his revenge. Rather than meeting with you on Friday to discuss your abstract (as you requested), he waits until Sunday night to contact you. And "coincidentally" requests a meeting smack in the middle of your Labor Day plans. You can try to change the meeting time, but it will be of no avail. Your advisor knows that you must answer his every beck and call. After all, you hope to graduate one day and emerge from this pitiful graduate existence.

Don't you?