Why I hate buy 1 get 1 free

Does anyone else hate it when a product you intend to purchase is buy 1 get 1 free? It drives me nuts. Why on earth can't they just make the product half off? Then I would not be forced to buy two loaves of bread when I only need one (for example). Whenever I come across a b1g1f, I have to spend several minutes deciding whether or not I want the second one.

Will I use it?
You might not. It could just go to waste.
Then again, it's "free" isn't it? I'd be a sucker if I left it here.
Not if you're just going to throw it away, you consumer whore.

My internal monologue is kinda mean.

That's one Martian step for man

... one giant le.. Oh my God! What are those creatures!?!? Ahhhhh!

Once upon a time, I dreamt of growing up to be an astronaut. That dream has pretty much faded for me for a variety of reasons (primarily that I am physically unqualified on account of my poor vision...and no... laser surgery would disqualify me). Back in the day I aspired to be the first human to walk on Mars. At the time, I had done the rough math and figured I might just be the right age if things went well for the next few decades. Clearly there have been some setbacks in recent times which has slowed the progress of space travel. And while I do expect we will see a man on Mars in our lifetime, I imagine we'll be past our prime by then. However, I'd like to get some audience participation in relation to the most important responsibility of whichever lucky American is the first to set foot on Mars. And that is:

What would be the perfect exclamation by the first human to step on Mars?

Think about it! This is the real challenge of walking on Mars. Consider the competition. "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind." I mean, my God. Talk about poetry! If you're about to be the first human on Mars, you damn well better have a quote prepared to beat that. Your voice is likely to echo through time and you don't want to say something stupid like, "Boy is it dusty here" or "Meh, I see no signs of water."

So readers, what do you think? What would you say?

Some Questions

I've got some questions I need answered. And maybe you people can help me.

• Question the first: What is the point of building a bathroom with a window? At what point will this window's shade be opened? Never! Unless the house belongs to an exhibitionist. It just seems like a waste of a window to me.
• Sub-question: Why is it that in the Chicago area many of these bathroom windows are in the shower? Seriously! Talk about impractical. The worst part about this is that the window frame (usually made of wood) tends to get gross and warped and... gross. If I ever get to move back to Chi-town, I refuse to live in an apartment where the shower has a window (though I've already lived in an apartment where the shower was in a closet).
• Pregunta dos: Why do people not make full use of their scarves? All too often I see someone wearing a scarf which practically touches the ground and yet they don't even have it wrapped once around their neck. If you're inside, that's one thing - this can look cool and trendy. But if you're outside and it is cold, don't be an idiot! I suppose it could just be Virginians who, as I've previously discussed, have difficulty dressing themselves.
• Sub-pregunta: People do this with hoods on sweaters and coats too. I like hoodies, but I feel too many people never make use of the hood itself. Why is this?
• Three: What on earth is the deal with all the interest in Judy Winslow? (or rather, Jaimee Foxworth) Of all the google searches leading people to my blog, the vast majority of them have to do with people wondering what happened to the forgotten Winslow child. (If you missed it, I've tackled this subject previously.) I'm starting to consider whether or not I should re-title my blog "The Judy Winslow Fan Club". Anyway, since this post will undoubtedly draw more curious googlers, here's a picture we can all smile and shake our heads at as we silently contemplate Judy's fate.

• 3b: Why did a google search for "licking feet videos" lead someone to my site? Ok well admitedly it was cause of my second Randy Beaman post, but still! I suppose the real question is - what on earth was this pervert hoping to find with such a search?

Maybe there are some things we're just not supposed to know the answers to.